L's Death Light's POV
by Emogirl88
Summary: I wanted to show Light POV or L's death. Death Note. I believe this is really what was going through Light's mind when this happened.


I stood there watching L in the rain. I yelled to him. "What are you doing standing out there all by yourself?" He made a signal that he could not hear me. I yelled it again, but louder. Again he signaled he could not hear me. I have no choice but to go out there.

I walk out into the pouring rain and I am instantly soaked. The rain is cold as it pounds upon my back. I do everything I can to not shiver in front of him. I walk over to him. "What are you doing, Ryuzaki?" He seems to not feel the coldness. He seems numb.

"Oh, I'm not doing anything impaticular, it's just… I hear the bells." He looks toward the sky. I am shocked, but I don't let him know. _Hear the bells? Could that mean he knows he will die? Does that mean he'll die today? But I don't think he should die so fast; I could use him for something else. No he'll have to die today, I don't care for him, and he's just annoying!_

"The bells?" I ask.

"Yes. The sound of the bells are unusually loud today." I look around. There are no bells.

"I don't hear anything." What is he talking about?

"Really? You can't hear it? It's been ringing non-stop all day. I find it very distracting." He looks at me. The water in his face. He knows. He has too. "I wonder if it's a church, maybe a wedding," Why did he mention that? Maybe he finds me as a friend for real… "Or perhaps a…"

"What are you getting at, Ryuzaki?" I want him to stop talking of the bells. He thinks of me as a friend and I am fixing to kill him, I don't need him to start talking of bells of his death right now. "Come on cut it out, let's get back inside." Maybe he'll stop talking about it if he isn't outside in the rain.

He looks down. He senses that I don't want to hear this. "I'm sorry," as if he was apologizing for trying to make me feel sorry for him, but it only makes me more regretful. "Nothing I say makes any sense anyway. If I were you I wouldn't believe any of it." I don't want to believe I am killing him. I am getting a sense of regret.

"Huh?" I tilt my head slightly to make it seem like I don't know what he's talking about. I look at his sad face. He and I both know he is going to die today and there is nothing that can stop it. "You know, you are totally right. Honestly most of the things you say sound like complete nonsense." I make light of this now to take both our minds off the oncoming death. "There'd be no in to my troubles if I took you seriously all the time. I probably know that better than anyone." And I do. I know him better than everyone, except his father, Watari. Some could say that we are best friends. But I can't care for him because I am going to kill him. I do care, though. I care for him now like a family member. But he is in my way to becoming God. And I will kill anyone in my way.

"Yes. I would say that's a fair assessment. But I could say the same about you." Accusing me of Kira, no doubt. Or a brother; either way.

"Hmm?" I play dumb. "What's that supposed to mean?" I look at him.

He looks back. "Tell me, Light, from the moment you were born, has there ever been a time when you really told the truth?" He's calling me a liar, but he's being a hypocrite; he lies about everything. I stay quite. Everything seems to go quite. The rain goes on, but the silence cuts through me worse than the spiking cold.

"Where is this coming from, Ryuzaki? I do admit I do stretch the truth here and there. However, find me one person in this world who never _had_ to tell a lie, trust me that wouldn't be easy. Human beings just aren't made to be perfect like that. Everybody lies from time to time." LIKE YOU! "Even so I have always made a conscious effort to be careful not to tell a lie that could hurt others. That's my answer." I wonder if he can tell I am lying, or if I care about him.

He looks down, defeated; sad. "I had a feeling you'd say something like that." That proved to him I am going to kill him, I just know it did. I'm sorry Ryuzaki , but I will have to kill you; you are too smart. "Let's go back inside; we are both drenched." He tried to make things slightly happier.

"Yaeh." And we went inside.

My shoes are off and I am drying my hair and face with a towel, when Ryuzaki came to me.

"Well, that was certainly an unpleasant outing." You're telling me; now I am feeling different. Now I am sort of sad to see you die.

"It's your own fault." It truly is. "I mean what did you expect?"

"You're right." He said this, but he isn't referring to the rain, he is referring to the obvious. Like as if he just said 'Well you are going to kill me now' and I just said 'It's your own fault. I mean, what did you expect?' Like he just admitted defeat; like he didn't want to believe I was Kira; like he really does care.

"Sorry," he said, but this time about getting me wet. I continue to dry myself while he pulls off his towel from his head. He walks in front of me to my feet. He squats down and picks up my right foot.

I gasp at the cold touch. "What are you doing?"

"I thought I might help you out? You were busy wiping yourself off anyway." Kind of weird.

In fact this is too weird. "Look, its fine you don't have to do that." I don't want him to make me feel any more regret.

"I can give you a massage as well?" I relax. He won't give up; I might as well let him do as he wants, he's going to die today anyway, whether I want him too or not. "It's the least I can do to atone for my sins." What does he mean by that? "I'm actually pretty good at this." Is he admitting me as his God? Has he done things that were very bad in his past? Why a foot massage?

Like I said before, he is going too died regardless so I'll let him do whatever. "Fine, do what you want." I look away.

"Alright." He holds my foot and with the towel he presses my arched part with such force, I grunt.

"Hey!"

"You'll get use to it." He continues. I watch him. Water drips from his hair onto my foot. I grab my towel and dry his hair a little.

"Here, you're still soaked." I really don't want him to die today. He is like my brother; I think I might miss him.

He looks slightly up then back to my foot. "I'm sorry." He dries my foot. I really do care for him. He continues to massage my foot and I continue to regret having Rem kill him. I can't stop her, because she loves Misa, and either Misa or L lives.

"It will be lonely, wont it?" I don't understand.

"Huh?"

"You and I will be parting ways soon." No! Don't do this to me L. I'm sorry! Don't make me feel any worse than I already do! I was ready to cry when his phone rang.

He stood up and answered it. "Yes? I understand. I'm on my way." It's almost time for him to die. He hung up. "Come on. Let's go Light. It seems like it's all worked out." I wish he would stop.

The rain poured harder outside and it seemed like the world was weeping for L. Like the rain would never stop; as if L was the most important person. I know he is to me…

We walked into the main room. "Ryuzaki! What's the meaning of all this?" He is worried I know. "You've, somehow, gotten approval from another country to use the notebook for an execution?" L sat down.

"Watari, excellent work. Thank you." L said to the computer.

"Not at all," Watari said back.

"First things first, please make arrangements to transfer the notebook immediately."

"Right," the computer went. I can't believe Ryuzaki did this! He can't send MY notebook off!

"Ryuzaki, what are you trying to do?" I asked calmly.

L picks up his coffee spoon and pokes the notebook a few times. "I'm going to try out the notebook for real." I was shocked. WHY would HE do THIS? Everyone in the whole room was shocked. But Ryuzaki didn't care.

Matsuda and someone else said something, but I didn't hear. I am focusing on L. I soon snapped out of my trance at Matsuda repeating the fake rule I planted in the notebook.

"If someone starts writing in the notebook they'll have to obey the 13 day rule and keep writing names forever." Matsuda told Ryuzaki as if he already didn't know.

"It's already been worked out. The person who will write in the book is a criminal scheduled to be executed in just over 13 days. If he's still alive 13 days after writing the name he'll be pardoned from execution." Matsuda gasped.

My dad started in. "But still, the sacrifice a life-"

He was cut off by L, "We are very close. If we work this out, the entire case will be solved."

_NO! This can't be! I cannot be found out this way! Rem! Hurry up! _At that moment I knew that Rem was after Watari. The power surged and Matsuda freaked out. Everyone but L and I started to worry. Then the world seemed to go quite for me. I know it wasn't really quite, that there was really noise all around me, but I was focused on L. Soon he became nervous when he finally realized Watari was dead. Big black letters appeared on the screen 'All data deletion' and he started freaking out.

Then he explained. "I told Watari to make sure that he should erase all information in the event if something were to happen to him."

The others said something, but my world was all black. No one was with me, but L. "Where is the shinigami?" I still couldn't believe this was happening right now. No noise was present but my heartbeat and L's. I was waiting in pain to hear it go blank. I was torn between the love I have for my new brother or the hatred I have for my sworn enemy. Friend or enemy. Love or hate. I still hear his heartbeat drum; faster and faster it goes. He knows he is about to die and there is nothing he can do about it. He panics in his mind, but he shows no signs of it now. Everything's dark; no one but us, I can't hear anything at all. I struggle to hear something; anything! Then I heard my best friend and worst enemy's voice for the last time. "Everyone, the shiniga-"

His last heartbeat; I hear it beat and I see his flinch at the pain. He froze in fear and his eyes get small; his face frozen in shock and pain. I become frozen as well, and I am very scared. I don't want my brother to die, but I know it's him or me. Part of me dies, and I don't want to go on. My world stops briefly and I feel his pain; I feel what he feels. The pain shoots through me and my head spins; my heart seems to stop as his does but I know it really doesn't. I start to feel a great sense of loss and disappointment. I then know he didn't want me to be Kira; he really and truly cared for me and loved me as family.

Then it all comes back to me. I still don't hear a thing and only he and I are in this dark place, but things go into slow motion. His spoon starts to drop; and so does he. My heart hurts more than ever and I start to panic. I can't see my brother die by himself on the cold floor. I still can't see anyone, but my best friend. I run and catch him as he nearly hits the floor. I catch him right before he hits the floor and I set him up so I can see into his dying eyes.

I finally here something other than the deafening silence.

"Ryuzaki! What's wrong?" Matsuda yelled; he sounds far, far away. Things come back but I can see the people in the room once more. Everything is blood red and I start to feel pain that I've never felt before. My heart aches and burns, my throat burns and there is a knot in it, I can't breathe so I do the only thing I can to keep from choking to death; I hold my breath. I feel the regret already and it hurts worse than anything.

I look down into the eyes of my brother; I see helplessness, disappointment, loneliness, sadness too. His eyes look pleading for an explanation, they beg for a reason; something I cannot give them. His pupils are small and I see the colours of his eyes, though cloudy they are. They start to dull and I know he is dying and I won't see him for a long time.

Suddenly I hear the bells, I hear them and no one else does but me and L. The others are oblivious, but L shares the sound with me, like a soft melody carrying him away. The looks on his face makes everything in my body flinch and clinch together; my heart shrieks with pain, but I keep it all in. I feel my eyes water and my lower lip tremble. I hear the bells as they get louder and more chime in. I know the shinigami is dying now and I am glade. She deserves death!

I plead in my mind for forgiveness and hope L will hear me. I plead and beg; I scream for it and I mean it all. And suddenly I know L understands. He somehow knows what I want and he knows I still care. He cares too. And all the things I saw in his eyes are replaced with love, happiness, caring, kindness, and forgiveness. And the hard, cloudy colours I saw before now become clear and visible. The grey and blue and white and black; they dance and sparkle in his eyes. His eyes become shiny once more then dull with the oncoming death.

For some reason my two personalities collide and my evilness appears to take on last glance at my enemy. I smile evilly as my eyes glow red. Then my care and love for my brother returns and my evil is set aside as my brother's eyes close; and he begins to die. Right before they close all the way and before he can no longer see, I smile sadly and sweetly just for him. And as he takes his final glance I could have sworn I saw him smile back.

Then when I know he has died, my smile begins to fade into the sadness that has overtaken me. The pain becomes too much and the tears start to flow. The knot loosens and I dare to speak. "Hey? Ryuzaki? Come on?" I can't take him dying! "Snap out of it!" He can't die on me! Not now, not ever!

Someone said something, I think it was my dad, but my pain and sadness overwhelms me and I don't hear. Then it gets to be too much. I let out a painful scream and the tears still flow. I CAN"T TAKE THIS!

Then a simple sentence came to me. Something L had said when we were chained together…

'So long as we wear these, we share the same fate. If I die so will you.'

He was telling me something. He didn't mean if we were still chained together from the physical chains, he meant the chains that linked us from the start. Ever since we met there were invisible chains that connected us and if he died I died; I live he lives. I am going to die and I know it. I don't know how though. I can try everything in my power to stop it from happening, but my death is going to happen. The only thing to do now is to keep trying to win.

I can try, but I won't succeed. And I will see L again.

So try I shall….


End file.
